00:00

I don’t intended to be awake and aware of the so-called new years eve, as usual, the date has changed and we were forced to live one more day.

I was asleep but then awoke when my stomach feels the urge to eat. And i haven’t had shower. This will be my first shower in 2016. Whatever.

I don’t make any resolution for the new year, I don’t feel I have to because there’s some point in life where you can see everything clearly and by then you’ll decides which path to take. Guess it’s not today.

Do I need to thank all the people who have been helping me through the past year? I don’t think so. It’s like a mutual relationship for me, we were learning (the same or different) life lessons at the same time, concomitantly. God makes us meet each other and creates a scene to be played.

Do I have to ask anyone who like or love me to really show me that they do in this new day of 2016? No, absolutely not. They who like or love you would always be around, every day of the year. You’ll know it. And when in doubt, just stop guessing and go. You’ll be safe from fracture hepatica.

Do I have to closed the chapter and move on? Well, you don’t need to wait for the new year to come to do it. When you’re having a bad chapter, analyze it and learn the lessons, close the case and just live your life. You have to do it immediately and then erase it from your memory. It’ll do nothing but hurting you..

So, I think it’s better for me to have a private chat with God. Thanking God for everything that happens in my life and tell that I love God. A quiet moment to let you know that God have the Super Power beyond every power in the universe.

Dear God,
I know that You were making me stronger from every hard time that You’ve faced me. I know that You believe that i can conquer all the obstacles and learned from it. I know that You are always be with me in every second of my life, even shorter than second. I believe that You hear all my prayers and only give the best, the things that I need eventhough sometimes it wasn’t what I expected. I believe that every good and bad thing have its own time to come, whether I’m ready or not, it all will be a blessing because I know I have something new to learn.
Thank you for all the love that You gave me through everyone I’ve met. Thank you for giving me another day to live, breath, smile, cry, and walk. Thank you for always be right next to me. Thank you for the awareness that You gave me, it really help me to analyze every hard time so that I can overcome the storms. Thank you for letting me born in a warm family and provide many lessons in life. Thank you for letting me realize my weakness and strength when I’m having troubles. Thank you for giving me a few best friends who I can turn to when I have no one to reach and help me to escape from drowning. Thank you for making paths for me to be able to meet many gorgeous people who I admired for their cleverness and strength. Thank you for letting me know how to behave to every unique individuals that crossing my path. Thank you for letting me feel love and kindness. Thank you, God, for everything. I love You.

B

The salty water of eyes

Those memories come around
There’s nothing I can do other than welcoming it

My head is over-flowing with photo slides
The smile
The place
The skin
That was so familiar for me

The pain
The joy
The love
The eyes
Every single things about you

Your mom
Your cold body
Your house
Everything

It’s always you
My deepest regrets
My joyous time
My sun smile

Rest in peace, Kang